Born and raised in Silver Spring, Maryland, Mr. Justin B Smith left the area in 1999 to enter the United States Air Force. After 4 years of honorable service, Smith left and came back to the Washington, D.C. area. In 2006, he was diagnosed with HIV and, in July 2008, Smith went on HIV medications, including Norvir, Rayetez, and Truvada. Smith presently resides with his partner in Laurel, Maryland. His CD4 count, as of March 7, 2009, was 431 with a Viral Load that is undetectable. He recently earned his AA in Communications and will pursue his Bachelor’s in Journalism.
mith spoke with Gay Life about how he became involved in HIV awareness and prevention efforts, his motivation for writing and producing videos about his personal journey as a young, black, HIV-positive gay male and overcoming barriers to more successful HIV-prevention strategies.

Why and how did you become active in promoting HIV awareness and prevention?

I became active in promoting awareness and prevention because of my own diagnosis. I also started because of my experiences when I worked with Us Helping Us People Into Living Inc. in DC. I was HIV-negative at the time and it was 2004. In 2007, a lot of people I knew started disappearing. I didn’t understand. One time I was dating this guy. He all of a sudden stopped calling me. I didn’t know what I did wrong. I called and called to see what was up with him. Still no answer. Then, about 3 weeks later, I was at the bar and another friend of mine. Terry told me that he had passed away. That night Terry told me that the guy I was dating was HIV-positive, and had renal kidney failure. This crushed me. Then, friends started dying one by one.   I felt like something needed to be done. I needed to find out why…why my friends were dying. It was killing me inside to see young black gay men my age dying…and dying of AIDS. 
 
You have both an online journal and video project. What motivated you to begin these projects?

I was infected with HIV in 2005 and diagnosed in 2006. I began to go the doctor at Whitman Walker Clinic in Washington DC regularly. Then, I moved to Baltimore. My body started going through some changes. I was more tired than usual. I changed doctors and began going to the Chase Brexton Clinic in Mt. Vernon. My doctor told me that my viral load was 261 and I might want to go on meds. I started doing more and more research on HIV medications. I noticed that there weren’t a lot of resources out there documenting what people were going through on HIV medications. As I thought more, I realized that this also could be done using audio and visual devices. I wanted to have a raw and candid approach to HIV/AIDS so people could see and hear what really happens, what could happen and what will happen. It seems more and more young people are being infected with HIV/AIDS whether they are gay, straight, bi, black, white, Hispanic/Latino or Asian. I wondered if young people were more receptive to watching than reading material, so with the arrival of YouTube.com I decided to invent Justin’s HIV Journal.

You’re a young black man living with HIV. What have you struggled most with?

It seems that there are a lot of struggles when you are black, gay, young and HIV-positive. I can’t mention just one. One struggle is that when I was single, I felt that nobody would love me, or nobody could love me. Another struggle is stressing yourself out just because you have this disease that continuously will throw surprises at your body left and right. Changing my life habits was hard as well. 

I personally think that people living with HIV, especially young black gay men, are most struggling with a lack of self esteem. The lack of feeling like they are loved. I don’t think a lot of people understand how hard it is being the minority of a minority, BUT we all go through a lot of the same things regardless of race or sexual orientation. I think a lot of us sometimes feel shunned because of our church’s view of who we are, because of the lack of support from the world and because of the lack of self worth a lot of us suffer from. What’s sad is that this is not just in Baltimore, the state of Maryland, or the U.S. This is around the world. We need to all love and support one another and people with HIV need more support than most. 

 
Despite the alarming rates of HIV/AIDS among African-American MSM, targeted awareness and prevention efforts remain scarce. What do you see as some of the primary barriers?

One of the primary barriers is lack of funding. A lot of our programs have suffered economic woes because of many years of under-funding. 

I also think a lot of messages that are used for preventive purposes have been used over and over again. I don’t think it’s getting through to young people. The youth of today haven’t seen the people who were dropping like flies in the 1980’s or 1990’s. Some young people believe that if they become infected, all they have to do is take a couple of pills and they will be fine and not have to worry about anything, which is untrue. I believe preventive measure have to be changed and quickly. We need something in their face, something that they can relate too.

 
You often address the stigma surrounding HIV/AIDS in your writing. What steps can individuals and communities take to work towards erasing this stigma and its harmful effects?

I think the first thing that needs to be done in the community is education. Our communities need to learn how to embrace people with HIV/AIDS and to learn not to be afraid of them. The community needs to know the basic reality that people cannot get HIV/AIDS just by doing everyday activities. 

Individuals need to be honest. Being honest about your status gives you more power than you know and it gives others the power to know that it is ok to be open and honest about your HIV status. The more you are open, the more others will be open about their status. Also, when people start becoming honest about their status, some of their unsafe behaviors may start to dissipate. 

Going back to communities, I need to say these are your fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters and children that are dying of this disease. Without your help and support, they will surely die. 

Justin’s HIV Journal:  www.justinbsmith.com  & www.youtube.com/jsmithco98 .

Justin B Smith’s MYSPACE Page:   www.myspace.com/babyboyjustin